Porch Swings and Sheds

I started off the day being productive. Meaning I made strawberry shortcake for breakfast (complete with ice cream...breakfast of champions).

Purging (not the strawberry shortcake) was then on my list of things to do, as I have way too much stuff. I started in the garage as Grace wanted me to be outside with her while she rode her bike.

The garage has been housing Grace's dilapidated crib (I'm pretty sure she never actually slept in

her crib a day in her life). I decided that rather than try and give it away as it was super gross, I would just dismantle it and throw it away...landfill hear it comes, eh? Dismantle I did, and that's as far as I got (minus throwing the hardware in the dumpster), as I decided the sides could definitely be repurposed for something.

Purging is not my strong point.

I'm blaming my brother and his wife for ending my morning purge as they stopped by and urged me to bring my kid and come hang out up at the property with them and Dad. So I headed up, bringing along part of the crib. :)

I turned it into a porch swing:

Dad and I also went to see his friend Junior, who operates a woodworking shop that manufactures playgrounds and sheds. We now have a plan. This fall, Junior is going to come check out my site, talk about exactly what I want, construct it in pieces at his shop, and then bring it to my site and slap it together...all within my budget. I'm super excited. It's going to be a tiny little bit smaller than I originally anticipated, but not exactly - maybe just configured differently. I had planed on a full loft that would fit two "bedrooms". What we're going with now is two sleeping lofts on each side of the cabin...I find this excellent...

...excellent I say.

A Bulleted List

• My daughter is currently attempting to sleep in her own bed. This is HUGE. I'm therefore staying away past my bedtime, so that I can be the "Sleep Fairy". Awesome.
• I really love the fact that I have friends that I can text and say, "You know Miss Havisham?" And they automatically get it and immediately reply, "Stop it. You will not become her."
• I'm leaning towards buying a shed, plopping it down and calling it home, rather than building. It just seems sensible. Not quite as rewarding, however most of my time is spent earning money, I should spend it. I should spend it on a "cabin" as I don't have time to build a cabin because, as I mentioned, most of my time is spent earning money. It's a cyclical argument I think.
• I went for a hike yesterday in Rothrock. Beautiful. Fun. Inspiring. We walked a road, and at the top it intersected the Mid-State Trail, which I was immediately pulled toward...I think it was sucking me in.
• I've been leaning towards an extremist position having to do with productivity, in that I can't see the point in engaging in any activity without practical application. I was driving and saw some people playing ladder ball, and literally scoffed at them in my mind. I shared this with mom last night, and she replied that the point is recreation. Recreation?! Oh goodness what's happening to me...
• After my hike yesterday, I put in the garden. 2 rows of onions, 2 rows of beets, 2 rows of green beans, 2 rows of collards, 3 rows of ambrosia sweet corn, 18 tomato plants, half a row of spinach, 4 rows of incredible sweet corn, 2 rows of onions, 1 row of bell peppers, 1 and a half row of hot peppers, half a row of green beans, 1 row of kale, 1 zucchini plant, 1 yellow squash plant, 1 hill of cucumbers (4 plants), 2 watermelon plants, and 2 cantelope plants. Done and done. Now we have upkeep. This year I will stay on top of weeding, and I will get all of it put up.
• Time to be the Sleep Fairy.

End list.

Gonna rise up, find my direction magnetically

I took Grace to her dad's this evening and learned a second important life lesson: don't get Nachoz from Sheetz when you're going to be driving for 2 hours with your dog in the passenger seat.

The first important life lesson learned a few weeks ago: don't get a Sheetza Pizza when you're going to be driving for 2 hours with your dog in the passenger seat.

Anyways, all that to say - after my Nachoz were 2 hours old, and my daughter had been dropped off, I headed to the nearest park with the dog in search of a picnic table (more desireable than a steering wheel). The nearest park that I knew of happened to be one that I on maybe three past occasions had found a smidgeon of solace. I could be, in the woods, with Grace, without him and there was peace. It was interesting being back there and feeling just a tinge of the old helplessness. But I enjoyed my Nachoz: didn't linger over the task. Just sat under my umbrella (a rainy picnic) and ate them then packed up my garbage and loaded my dog. Drove home.

Favorite sight while driving home: a red-winged black bird sitting on a fluffed out cattail.

fantastic

Add it to the list of things I absolutely neeeeeeeed:

Alliums. Gorgeous.

(p.s. I didn't take this photo...just Google image searched it)

Eating Cookies

Two days completely wasted due to the strep of the throat. Goodness. Yesterday's plan was to inoculate some stumps with some shittake plug spawn I bought...that will have to wait as it wasn't accomplished today either. The only accomplishment of the day (other than one amazing nap with Grace), was chocolate chip cookies. Oh and bills, but blah.

We voted against poured concrete pillars in lieu of treated lumber pillars. So my next step is making those treated lumber pillars out of 3 5x2"s soaked in motor oil and fasted together in some shape or form (I have such a clear cut picture as to how this is all coming together, obviously...). Haven't worked on them yet, as my spare time after work has been spent trying to prep the garden. 10 years it took dad to get the soil to an amazing state...1 year it took me to take it alllllll the way back to the beginning. I'm just *that* good. So I've done two passes with the tiller (which I was super excited to actually start by myself, after a good 5 minutes of standing in the garden simply looking at it thinking "what the crap is a choke?"), I need to do at least 5 more, then let the weeds grow and kill them off, till again and plant. And labor day is this coming Monday.

Behind. Very, very behind.

As dad says, "you've got more ideas, than you have time." I wish it wasn't such a toss up between having to have a real job with all the "security" that promises, and actually doing the things that are important in life.

Enough. I'm gonna eat me some cookies.

Earth Day

Yesterday I learned how to use a chainsaw, and cut down trees - even then cut them into firewood and stacked it. I then learned how to turn on the tractor, and drive it (both forwards and backwards) and hooked it up to the stump of one of the trees I cut down and ripped it up (exposing an ugly, muddy hole).

And all of this occurred on Earth Day. How ironic. I justify it by the fact that these things HAD to happen in order for me to live a "green" lifestyle in an off grid cabin.

Also, I have to say that it was completely empowering. All - "I am woman, hear my chainsaw roar." Today I had the thought of having a Rosie the Riveter image burned into the wood of my front door. Ha.

Aladdin

Yesterday Dad told me that he's going to start his porches soon, and when the concrete truck comes up he wants me to be ready to pour my pillars. So today I'm not working - it's close to 60 degrees outsdie, it's 8:30 am (probably a bit later now) - and I'm thinking I may sew. Ridiculous.

Also, dad ordered me an Aladdin Lamp for my birthday - super exciting, however it's not going to necessary if I don't actually work.

start

from my leather-bound physical journal:

I was going to buy a new journal as I couldn't quite bring myself to write in this one from *that* time. But then I figured it was good for context - turning a leaf, rebirth, healing, etc. Sure sure. On to a new struggle - after this, it'll be another. Ha.

The current struggle - for independence? For maturity? (Ha.) for the fulfillment of dreams? Or simply a struggle against myself (that's highly simplistic - and not at ALL dramatic). The tangible "struggle" - that of my cabin. I'd just decided I was fed up with not having my own space and was going to move into the mule shed...the day after that dad says, "You know there's no reason you can't start your cabin now - clear the land, stake it out, dig your holes and pour your pillars." So easy. Sure sure. Bye bye quick fix of "practicing off-grid living" in the mule shed...hello reality of starting the dream - and I've stalled. Now that I've got the go-ahead...I'm doing nothing. Typical. I have all kinds of excuses of course: It's cold. I dislike Spring. Grace simply cries too much for me to accomplish anything besides playing with her (which I don't do well enough - enter mother guilt). I'm too tired after cleaning rooms all day. Goodness...